The Phone and the Keys


Case # 1.

There was a call on her mobile as soon as she dialled her husband’s number from the office land phone. Her mobile was inside her vanity bag and it vibrated noiselessly.

Her husband remains asleep when she leaves for the office by 8:30 in the morning. It’s after she reaches her office, rings him up, that he wakes up and gets ready for his office. Her phone acts like an alarm signal for him. So, that is the first thing she does after reaching her office.

But he was not picking up the phone, and on the other side the mobile went on vibrating. She kept the receiver back on its mantle, and opened the bag to receive the call on her mobile. But the call too got disconnected as soon as she opened the bag.
She redialled her husband’s number from the office land phone. He was not picking up the phone. And again there was a call on her mobile. After some time, she again kept the receiver back on its mantle and went to receive the call. But as soon as she went to receive the call, the call got disconnected.
‘Now that is ridiculous’, she thought.
She again dialled his number, and again there was a call on her mobile. And when she kept the phone, the call got disconnected.
‘What is it?’ She pondered.
After a moment’s pause, she smelt something fishy. She then checked the numbers on her mobile from where those three calls were made.

It was her office landline number.

‘How could this be possible?’, when she was dialling his number from the same office phone all the while?

Unless...

Suddenly it struck to her, that it her husband’s mobile that she was holding in her hand.

Actually, it was her husband’s idea to buy two same sets for both of them – a token of togetherness, one can say. And she had picked up her husband’s mobile phone thinking to be hers...

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Her husband was leaving early for the office. It was one of those rare occasions of course. He had some meeting with the client, and so he pleaded to let him use the bathroom first. She was in no hurry or even if she was, she would have let him go first. The reason mainly being the exceptionally rare occurrence of the event.

‘Did you take your set of keys?’ he was all ready to leave, when she reminded him to take his set of keys, in case he returned from the office before her.

‘Where are my keys?’ he looked back standing at the main door.

‘It must be in your trousers pocket, the one you wore yesterday’ that was the most probable place.

‘I don’t have time now to search the pockets. Leave it’, these trifle things did not matter to him, he would only because she insisted him to do.

‘Wait. Then take my set of keys. They are dangling from the locks.’ She knew that it was important that he has a set of keys with him, because in case he returned first from the office and did not have the keys with him, he would blame her in turn for not reminding him to take the keys.

He simply took the keys dangling off from the locks and left for the office.

Now, it did not matter much if he had taken her set of keys. The matter was that now she had to search for his set of keys in order to lock the door before leaving for her office. This was not an easy task as her husband was kind of a genius in misplacing things...

She was right. She searched for another half an hour for those set of keys. And ultimately she found them.

They were on the kitchen shelves.

‘Genius!’ she gave a big sigh and left for her office.

Case # 2.

She had just reached the office and sat before her computer, when there was a call in her mobile. Her mobile was as usual in her bag, and in a vibration mode. She opened her bag to find that some unknown person had called, and the person’s name though saved in the Phone Book, was unknown to her.

She picked up the phone, ‘Hello?’
There was a moment’s silence on the other side.
‘Well, I wanted to talk to Suman, is he there?’ it was a hesitant male voice.

Now,’ Why would somebody call on her mobile to ask for her husband?’ she thought.

‘Unless, Oh no … ‘, she observed carefully that she had again brought her husband’s mobile phone by mistake.

It was all because of the rush that she had in the morning. She was frantically searching for her mobile all over the house. She was already late for the office. And when at last she found the mobile, below a heap of garments on the bed, she did not check whether it was hers or her husband’s. She had picked up the mobile quickly, and dropping it into the bag she had left for the office in hurry.

So, now having done the blunder, she gave the caller her mobile number and asked the caller to call on her number since her husband will be now be presumably taking her mobile phone to office.

After a few seconds, there was another call. But this time again it was from the bag itself.

But she was already holding the mobile in her hand.

‘Then?’

She reached for the bag, opened it, and found that it was her mobile phone vibrating this time.

So the phone which she had been searching so much in the morning was in her bag after all.

But that also meant that she had brought both the phones today by mistake...

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Soon after she reached the office, her husband called up. She was in fact expecting the phone. He was not able to find his set of keys. It did not surprise her. He demanded to be in a hurry and refused to search any further, sounding as if he would keep the door ajar and leave for the office.
She had no choice but to tell him to apply another lock on the gates, the one which was used for the Veranda grills though she did not have the spare keys for it. So she told him that she would collect the new keys from him from his office itself. He sounded convinced. She had planned this entire alternative just a while ago.

On the day before, when she had reached home, it was very late. She was not used to being late, as she came quite early every day long before her husband would arrive. And it was after a long time that she was late from office. She was very exhausted as well, and so she had a sound deep nights’ sleep. In the morning she no more remembered that she was late on the evening before, and that her set of keys was in her bag only as she did not have to open the locks. Instead she thought she had come at the usual time. So, like any other usual day, she had picked up the keys dangling from the locks thinking them to be hers. And then she left for her office.

It was only after she had gone some way, when suddenly like a dream she recollected that she was late on the evening before, and that she already had her set of keys in her bag, and it was her husband’s keys that she had so consciously picked up just a while ago in the morning.

In the evening, she had to go all the way to her husband’s office just to collect the keys first, and then she headed for the home.


Case # 3.

As usual she opened the bag to take out her mobile. She could not find her mobile which should have been in the bag.

Now a day she is more careful while picking up the mobile phone while leaving for office. So, the mobile phone which she had ignored by mistake in the morning thinking to be her husband’s, was actually hers.

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After a long tiring day at the office, she would slowly clamber up the stairs of her house, wondering why this clambering of stairs made her totally drained of all her remaining energies. Was it due to the gravitational pull, against which she had to put her efforts? That was more likely a reason because she did not stay at the first or even the second floor; she had to go all the way till the 3rd floor, upon reaching which each time she would feel like sitting there and there itself at her door steps.

Today also there was no exception to her daily routine. The only thing that went amiss once she had reached her floor was her set of keys.

She was the one to reach home first on most of the cases. So after unlocking the door, it would be her set of keys dangling from the locks. She would then consciously remember to take the keys off and put them back in her bag. Basically she did not need the keys again till the next evening when she would return from office. Because, in the morning also she was the first one to leave for office, and so her husband would lock the door with his set of keys when he would leave for office.

But she came from office late yesterday. So she did not have to open the door with her set of keys. And her husband was there to open the door for her.
So, ideally she should have had the keys in her bag only.

Something was not fitting into the place.

She went over the sequences again. Each day was almost the same. It was hard to remember such uneventful daily normal routine things. They get overlapped each time.

She started questioning herself. Did she come early as usual? No she was late. This means that she did not have to bring her set o keys out at all. Was her husband late? Yes, he was late too ... And, then, she remembered. Her husband too was late, and later than her, which meant she had to unlock the door first with her set of keys. And all the while she had thought that she was already late, so she did not have to use her set of keys, and they were safely in her bag.

Nothing could be done now. The harm was already done. She had forgotent to take the keys off the locks and put them back in her bag. She rang up her husband and he unapologetically said that he would not be able to leave before another hour. She could not be also angry on him, because it was plainly her fault. Her cooking maid arrived after some time and luckily she also waited along with her giving her some crude companion on the stairs.

That evening, she and her maid had to sit on the stairs for two and half hours, before her husband came to their rescue at last...

How Nitu got insulted

No matter when Nitu went to sleep, she had to wake up by 5:30 in the morning. And she was not spared from this routine on Sundays, not even on winter Sundays. It was all because her maid servant came around that time, whom she could not afford to loose at any cost, so she really had no choice. But waking 5:30 in the morning … was just pathetic for her. It was only her good spirits that she did not let all these 'earthly' matters bother her. She was someone who would get least perturbed for the most disturbing fact of the year may be. A peaceful soul I should say.

After explaining the tasks to her maid she quickly went to another round of sleep. She knew Sanku (her husband) would take care of the rest. Theirs was a one in a million relationship, where the husband acted as the ideal wife and the wife as you can imagine, acted as the reverse.

Her maid woke her up at around 10 am. "Boudi, get up now, you have been sleeping since morning, and look at your husband, he has been doing all your household chores since then."

Now, it does feel like an insult, to be woke up by one’s maid servant only to be told that her husband had done all which she was supposed to do as a wife, is not it? But as I told you, she could not help it. However, the jovial soul that she was, she was not perturbed.

So, she woke up. And found out that her husband had cleaned all the parts of the refrigerator, the aqua guard, had put aside the dirty bed sheets and clothing for washing, had arranged the almirah and all the rooms, had cleaned the toilets and he might have done many more chores which she could not figure out just waking up from her sleep.

After watching all that, an obvious tinge of guilt touched her. All was done and done with perfection, all while she was asleep. In fact for the rest of the day she had nothing else to do. Even then she searched in her mind if there was any trifle thing that she could contribute to. Nothing came to her mind. Standing and watching Sanku to do all the household chores seemed to be only thing left to do for her. But again it was so awkward, watching somebody toiling hard while doing nothing. So, she went to watch the television instead. But there also, she could not sit peacefully and watch the television. Something bugged in her mind.

So, she rose, went to her husband again to see what he was doing. He was still busy with scrubbing. Noticing his sweat, she then took the table fan from their bedroom and the chair to him, placed the fan upon the chair facing in his direction. At last having done something made her feel less guilty too.

The breakfast being already prepared by the maid, she made him two cups of tea and served him along with the breakfast. His hands were occupied, so she had to feed him the breakfast. It gave her a sense of relief, as if she did make up for all the effort he had put since morning. Immediately she forgot all her guilty feelings and was back to her jovial form again.

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The next Morning - a Monday morning, Nitu was on her way to the Baghajatin auto stand. She had tuned into the FM on her cell phone and had FM chords plugged into her ears. She was looking for an auto on the road itself if available before the auto stand. Seeing one she instantly shouted to the auto driver to stop by. She was just getting onto the auto, when suddenly she heard a hoard of shouts together and it seemed as if they were all aimed at her. The sound came from nearby, so took off the FM earphones to be clearer.

There were some school children in a Tata Sumo, all of whose heads were popping out of the window, they were all giggling, and waving their hands at her. She was puzzled to see all those kids calling after her because she knew none of them.

She thought there might be anything wrong with her dress or so, so she gave a quick look around her dress. Nothing seemed wrong. Even the driver of the Tata Sumo, not knowing what the matter was, had now pulled over by her side. All the people on the road and the shopkeepers were looking at her in curiosity now.

"What is the matter", she asked them. One of them - a girl, who looked as if to be their leader, asked her - "Didi, why do boys wear nail polish?". And it was their so sought after question.
She could not believe her ears. What a question! That to be asked by a bunch of kids, in the mid of the road to someone they did not know at all and in what a manner. Everyone on the road was watching her, and she stood there speechless in the mid of the road to be the victim of a bunch of mini hooligans. She wondered, why she out of all these people on the road, to be insulted in such a helpless manner. Even the auto that she had shouted to stop had moved on by now.

Irked by the silliness of the children she told their driver not to waste time after those mini hooligans and asked him move on. The equally irritated and confused driver started off and on his way he requested the same auto after which she had shouted, to stop for her.

The auto stopped and she finally got on the auto only to find another school kid with the same school uniform sitting inside the auto with his mom. The mom too had been watching the school kids’ antics till now, and so she asked her what was the matter. Nitu narrated her entire episode what had happened.

"Oh, and I thought you were the new teacher at their school, waiting for the Tata Sumo to get on to.” the mom replied."Oh, no, I work in a office," she clarified again, swearing in her mind that she would never be a teacher in a school where such a bunch of jungle kids studied. She then asked the auto driver to stop by the pink bus already waiting on the main road.The school kid who was sitted next to her, quiet till now, then remarked - "Is that your school bus?”

No, not again, Nitu fumed inside. "No, of course not. That is my office bus, and not a school bus", she got down of the auto coldly.

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It was Rosogolla's Astamangala in the same evening, and Rosogolla had come to her parents’ house eight days after her marriage, as the general Bengali custom is. Nitu had visited Rosogolla's place before on the day of Rosogolla's marriage itself but she had come then with Sanku with his bike. So she did not pay any attention either to the roads or to name of the places.

Now, that she was invited to Rosogolla's Astamangala ceremony and Sanku not being available she had to visit Rosogolla's place all by herself, she remembered only the ways and directions. So, she asked Sanku the name of the places where she has to get down and all. Sanku told her that at first she had to take an auto to 3A Bus stand and then take a rickshaw from 3A Bus stand to Rosogolla's place. It seemed easy enough to Nitu.

So, she went to the auto stand, asked an auto driver at the stand whether it plied till 3A Bus stand. The driver said that it plied till Behala 4 way crossing, after which she had to board another auto in order to reach 3A Bus stand.

The option of having to change an auto was not much fine with her and she boarded the auto sheepishly. On her way, one by one the passengers got down, till after some time she was the only passenger left in the auto. It put her in an uncomfortable state of mind. After driving some more distance, the auto came to a stop finally.

She breathed a sigh of relief as if she was out of some danger or something, and asked the driver happily, "So dada, this is the Behala 4 way crossing."."No, no this is the 3A Bus stand itself. Actually you looked so uncomfortable as if you were never on the roads before. So I drove you till 3A Bus stand instead of dropping you at Behala 4 way crossing.” the auto driver promptly replied back.

Now, that was enough of insult for an engineer to be told that she looked as if she were never on the roads."You need not have thought so much." she was caught and she was not at all happy for that, "Anyways, thanks.", "Do call somebody from your home immediately, or you might get lost in the city", the driver added and went off.

Nitu tried to brush off the comment, and head for the Rickshaw stand instead.

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Nitu was more confident about the Rickshaw part, since she knew the directions and ways from here.

She boarded a Rickshaw, confidence radiating from her face, and instructed the driver, "Let's go."

The driver looked at her and asked "Where?"

"You just keep moving, I will tell you the directions and ways", she confidently replied back.

"You do not know the name of the place?” the rickshaw driver was still not on his pedals.

"Of course, I know the place; I am telling you to drive straight, and then I will instruct you accordingly"; Nitu was now irritated by the whims of the Rickshaw driver.

"But the place must have some name", the rickshaw driver was not convinced."Will you go or shall I board another Rickshaw?” her day did not seem to favour her.

The Rickshaw puller finally started to go straight as per her instructions. After going some distance, the road went on to bifurcate into two directions. Nitu instructed him to go to right after giving a second's thought. It was getting dark and more difficult for her now to recognize the directions too. She was expecting to see a Kali Temple next, and now the Rickshaw driver was now driving for a long time. May be he was slow, at least slower than Sanku’s bike on which she had come earlier, so the timing might not be right, she thought to herself.

Not seeing the Kali Temple which she had expected to see by now, she was now not sure whether she was on the right track or not. She just waited and hoped that she was right on the track. Otherwise it would be the worst day that she ever came across.

After going some more distance, she saw the temple that she was waiting for so long, and out of spontaneity she gave a jump of joy at her seat itself. "That is it, you just have to go on the right now, and two houses more and I will reach my destination". Hearing her, the Rickshaw driver stopped to show her a sign board which stood just beside the Kali Temple. "Please remember the name of this place Madam. It is NabaPally James Log Sarani. So that from next time onwards, you can tell the Rickshaw driver at least the name of the place you want to go. OK Madam?"

She coldly bore the insult and said, "OK, I will remember, now please move on".
"Please do not mind madam, but it is not your fault also that you don't know the roads and all. My wife also is exactly like you. She does not know anything. She cannot even distinguish between 3A Bus stand and Behala 4 way crossing, she is so naive", the rickshaw driver went on talking.

Now being compared with a Rickshaw driver's wife was definitely not a complement for her, "I do mind", was her short reply. She felt like jumping off the Rickshaw and walking off the remaining distance. She might have even done so, if the distance would not have been a short one now.

Soon they reached Rosogolla's house, and she quickly paid the fare to him.
"It was nice to meet you Madam.’Hands up', Namaskar", the rickshaw driver went off back to his own track.

Perhaps he meant to Hand Shake.

Despite Differences ...

It was one of those rare scenes.

The bed sheets were clean and smoothly spread over the bed. The pillows all neatly piled one upon another at a decent corner of the bed. The quilts all folded and placed below the pillows. Everything just the way she did. And it was not a dream.

Returning from the office, entering the room, she had almost screamed, “Who did the BED?”

“”Me” was the short answer from her all smiling husband, almost proud of what he had done, having returned from the office early that day.

She stood there or some time.

She was impressed.

And, then she remembered how they had fought just a couple of days back.

She had a fetish for vegetables, while he was one whom one would call as a pure ‘non-vegetarian’.

Right from the moment she woke up in the morning, she would start thinking what to cook for him in the night. It was not for her self that she thought. It was her husband that made her worried.

He just could never understand, what was there to so much worry about, that too from the morning itself? Is cooking something to worry about? And worry about his meals? That is ridiculous, he would mutter to himself. One simple fish curry, and an omelette of double eggs, is just more than suffice for him. So? What is the big deal about it?

She was always at the end of her wits of what to cook for him. It was getting difficult for her to manage the daily cooking routine. How could one possible eat all egg, fish or meat and complete his lunch? No starters like fried vegetable? Yaak!!! ‘Gosh… This man does not have any taste at all’.

He loved fish curry alright. But, he always found that either the fish is not well cooked or the cooking maid did not fry them well, so how could he possibly eat them? And she just would not understand this simple thing of his. And she treated him as if it was his fault. But, he could not help it, is not it?. And those eggs, he did not want them so much boiled. When cooked in a curry, eggs ought to be half boiled, and kept within the warm water for some time. ‘Nobody has taste ….. #%#$%#% (neither his wife nor the cooking maid)’, he would conclude with disgust.

She could not make him taste her green delicacies. She would get annoyed, and then angry, really angry. After all, why cannot he taste some? It’s not something inedible. Is not it that something that human beings don’t eat? And now, if she had to buy vegetables solely for herself, she had to buy more than required, just because the shop keepers won’t sell so less an amount. And then, she had to do all the eating by her self which she really hated [to eat something alone without sharing the joy of it].

His in laws were another nightmare for him. He remembered how his mother in law (read monster in law) had once asked him to eat cooked lotus stems. As if they were edible vegetables. Who has ever heard of it? Yaaak!!!!!!! He had managed somehow to escape that time, by passing onto the material to his wife’s plate. Gosh……… One should have seen how she loved to devour them.

It was not that she did not like eggs, or fish or meat. But for her they were for special occasions and a part of the meal but not the entire meal. And she really could not do without something green on her plate. As she ate her green preparations she always felt sorry for her poor husband who missed so many delicious delicacies.

He loved to prepare the omlette in an utmost suave manner. He would take two eggs, beat them vociferously, and then spread them on the fuming sauce pan, till they swelled and a delicious smell brewed. He really took a genuine pride in doing that. And most of all he loved to prepare one such masterpiece of his dear wife. ‘Well, can really such a magnificent omlette be compared to a lotus stem preparation? Naa ….’ he always grinned inside with pure satisfaction.

She was happy that day, when besides mutton, he had also brought her a green, round, young gourd. It was like a gift for her. That was so thoughtful of him, she had mused. Some times, in happy moments of cooking, she would tease him by saying, that he rooted from the rich Jamindars of kolkata and that she came from the poor villages of Bangladesh, and so their tastes had to differ and that it could not be helped, it was destiny. And they would laugh over it for a long time.

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She loved her husband, and at the depth of her heart, she knows that he too loves her a lot. It was not an easy relationship since they both had to go through many hardships, before being able to tie the knot. So, the knot was all the more dear for them. After all those hardships which they went through, they could not think of giving it away so easily.
And, despite all those differences in their likings of food, they would eat from the same plate, at the end of the day.

[It was only occasionally, when the issue would take a larger shape that they would eat from separate plates. :-)]